Wednesday, February 8, 2012

You're My Everything: Heaves, Hives, and Rehearsals

Before we knew it, we had spent the better part of the day visiting with our bridal party, and it was time for the rehearsal.  Let me be upfront about something: punctuality isn't always my strong suit.  With that being said, I like to be responsible for my own tardiness, as opposed to being late because of others' actions.  I get majorly anxious whenever I'm forced to run late to something that is of high priority to me.  I would consider our wedding rehearsal to be a great example of this phenomenon.  I had gotten ready with the perfect amount of time to spare, but we weren't able to hit the road as early as I would have liked because we had a caravan full of people with us.  With that many bodies looking for a missing shoe, grabbing one last swipe of lip gloss, or running a straightener one final time, it's inevitable that you're going to be late.  I felt out of sorts because I was running late to my very own rehearsal.

I let out a big sigh once we got to the church, or, at least, I tried to.  Instead of being relieved that we had arrived and could get this show on the road, I was inundated with more reasons to worry.  Namely, I walked through the doors to the church to find about 25 people all looking expectantly back at me and one person even announced "Wow, everyone beat you here!"  Definitely didn't help my stress level.  I couldn't even process what was going on, and then I was all of a sudden being told to go up to the altar to meet with the wedding coordinator, who then proceeded to ask me for my unity candle and a sample wedding program... neither of which had ever been mentioned as "must-haves" for the rehearsal.  I embarrassingly told her that I had neither, to which she responded with a "Well, um, that's OK.  We'll just have to make do, I suppose."  Perfect, thanks for that vote of confidence.

I returned to the pews, where everyone else had assembled, and officially felt like I had earned the title of "Most Disorganized Bride Ever."  The fact that I didn't think to bring a program or the unity candle (despite the fact that I was never asked to bring them) made me feel like SUCH an inadequate human being.  Seriously.  I started to get shaky, nervous, and sweaty.  The priest then called me back to try and find the readings I had selected (which were listed in the MIA program), and thankfully we were able to remember which readings had been selected.  I had been at my own rehearsal for about 5 minutes and had already committed a big handful of no-nos.  I was a mess.  The palms of my hands were drenched in sweat, I felt clammy, and I thought I was about 2 seconds from a serious bout of some dry heaves.  And, fun fact, I get stress hives on my face if I have a mildly stressful conversation about paying the cable bill, so you can imagine how blotchy and itchy I was getting at this stage in the bridal-fail game.

Once again, I tried to collect myself, with Mr. Snow Cone reassuring me that now that the rehearsal was underway, things would be fine.

Please note the death-grip I had on Mr. Snow Cone's hand during all of this. 
Photo by my brother P

Our priest led the group in a prayer session, reflecting on our reading selections and commenting that they were rather peculiar for a wedding (again, thanks for the confidence).  He then asked our readers to come forward and practice their readings... which, they had never laid eyes on.  Fortunately, we picked two perfectly literate individuals to do our readings, so they were able to nail the text on the very first go.  Plus, they had the foresight to not totally throw me under the bus regarding my inability to give them a preview of their readings ahead of time.  That, my friends, is why you give important roles to awesome people.  The way they nailed the potentially-difficult Biblical verses set the tone for the rest of the rehearsal.  I started to feel like myself again, rediscovering the task-masker, organized bride inside me.  I tried my best to lower my stress level, get rid of my itchy hives, relax my over-active sweat glands, and calm my stomach in order to get through the rest of the rehearsal.

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